Naughty child: a guide to action
One of the most common phrases that parents use when speaking of her children: "I do not understand why he / she behaves!".Such emotions Emotions and culture: how to decipher the emotional code usually causes a naughty child.My parents do not really understand the reasons for the bad behavior of the child, whom they tried to raise the birth good and obedient.However, nothing happens without a reason - and children do not go against the wishes of parents for a reason.What are the causes of unruly behavior, and how to cope with a child who stubbornly wants to do things his own way?
reason №1.The child of parents to check the strength of
Not literally, of course.The main task of the child, and an adult - to understand how the world works, and learn to interact with it so get what you need and want.Features a child for study of the world and achieve the desired greatly dependent on their parents, and so he is constantly trying to find the limits of what is permitted and the limits of human patience that affect their well-being.Throw a fork, spoon, plate on the floor and see what would happen;refuse to eat and see what will be;refuse to go to sleep, run away from his mother during a walk: it all - how to verify the strength of the parents.He probes you to understand that the more you let him, and where it is necessary to stop.
What to do?Set clear rules and restrictions, and follow them religiously.It is impossible today to allow the child to violate the ban, and tomorrow punished for the same offense.He should be fully aware that the rules are always alone.The presence of such rules is not only making life safer parents, but also helps the child to become more confident - oddly enough, the lack of defined boundaries in life leads to insecurity in children and sometimes to serious psychological problems.
reason №2.Different levels of expectations in school and at home
sequence is extremely important for the child to feel comfortable and confident.If he notices that the school is demanded of him a lot more than at home, or vice versa, and, as a consequence, in school and at home his behavior and personality evaluated differently, this can lead to severe stress How to beat stress?Create an oasis , one manifestation of which is the naughty behavior.
to improved behavior, it is necessary to eliminate the contradictions.Talk to your child's class teacher and find out exactly how it communicates with the children how to resolve conflicts, what to expect from them, how to encourage and punishes.Explain what methods of discipline you use.As the teacher is unlikely to be radically change their behavior (still has a lot of students and a great experience, and probably in large part of his working methods), you will need to change.Try the house to use the same methods used by the teacher - perhaps in slightly different forms, adapted to the home environment.It is not necessary to copy the teacher;Your goal is to have the child did not have the feeling that in school and at home he is treated as two completely different people.It should be noted that such measures are necessary only if the level of expectations in school and at home, as well as educational methods, really very different.
Reason №3.The child does not understand the rules or the requirements of the parents unreasonable demands
Sometimes, children want too much.Making demands and setting the rules, you should always take into account the age and level of development of the child.For example, it is wrong to demand that a child of two years removed from his room, and expect it to fully handle the job.At this age, your child will need help and guidance of parents.
Parents should read books on child development, to get an idea of what and at what age it should be able to do.Furthermore, the ability of great importance.If a child is not given math, do not ask him to, he received on this subject, and five participated in Mathematical Olympiads.
reason №4.The child seeks independence
With about two years, children are becoming more independent, and at the same age problems start because of disobedience.The child wants to decide when he sleep, eat, get dressed, brush your teeth How to brush your teeth: interesting facts - a natural phenomenon, although it is very unpleasant for the parents.
Give your child as many opportunities to make decisions independently.Ask him where he wants to go for a walk, he cook some porridge, along with him, choose the clothes in the store, and so on.Thus, the child is at least partly to satisfy his need to show independence, and it will be less reason to rebel.
reason №5.The child is sick, hungry, tired, or he wants to sleep
If a child misbehaves, first you need to make sure that he feels good.Maybe he did not get enough sleep on a regular basis and gets tired - you should pay attention to its schedule and may slightly reduce the burden on the child.
Reason №6.The child does not have enough information and experience
When a child first enters the road, he did not know that you need to first look at both sides to make sure that no cars, and only then move on.All this he must explain to the parents.The same is required in many other situations.The child should be repeated several times, how to behave in a given situation, before he will remember this and will act accordingly.Explain the rules of conduct should be relaxed;If you shout at the child, all that he will understand - this is what you get angry, and words to him simply do not reach.Be sure explains their demands: a "no, no" in response to the question of whether to climb a tree, the child may be taken as usual whim parents.But if you explain to him that he could fall and be seriously injured, the attitude to the ban will be different.
reason №7.Baby copy the behavior of parents
If parents are constantly swear, do not reckon with opinion and do not fulfill the requests of each other, the child probably will behave well.Pay attention to your own behavior before calling the child naughty.