How to cope with children confrontation characters


how to cope with children When a child is three years (or so), and when the parents only have time to breathe a sigh of relief after the sleepless nights, the first disease and fear that few people can escape in the first few years of baby's life,begin new challenges.How to cope with children in various problem situations that often become a stumbling block?

child refuses to perform mundane requests, strongly opposes everything that was offered, and seems to be constantly battling with the outside world.Someone this period passes quickly enough, and some children are too stubborn for the next few years - these are features of nature, and although it has its pluses, they occur much later;now parents have to deal with a wayward child, "I" is growing much faster than his body.

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Cleaning

situation: The child spent half a day, pulling toys from boxes and cabinets, and when it's time to remove them, refused to do so.

What: Young children are often unable to get clean toys, inviting them to make it a race: who will collect more toys in five minutes or less fill the toy box.Stubborn children are usually carried away by such a game - they are trying to use every opportunity to show ourselves and others, what they can do.You can even record the child's achievements in the field of cleaning, hang a sheet of paper with the appropriate entries on the wall of his room and invites him to beat his own record.Some parents have even come up with a system of incentives for new records.

older child (four years) to offer to act as assistant to the parents.To offer it is necessary not just so, and highlighting its advantages, such as: "You're so good to lay the table / water the flowers, and help me with the cleaning - for a start, gather toys."So the child will think that clean toys - a privilege that not everyone deserves, and will treat it, not as a heavy burden.

Always use encouraging words instead of threats.For example, instead of saying "You're not going to walk into the park, is not clean toys" you say, "As soon as you sweep the toy, you can go to the park."If the answer to this, he says that he still wants to go to the park, because there he was waiting for friends, gently continue to insist on: "Of course, you can go to your friends ... as soon as you have gathered toys."

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Bath and sleep

Situation: A child knows when it's time to take a bath, then soon he will be put to bed, so he either does not want to go to the bath, or does not want to get out of it, orHe continues to struggle in the bedroom, battling with pajama pants and shirt, which it tried to put the parents.

What to do: borrow method, which perfectly familiar filmmakers - using music to affect a person's mood.Soft music will help the child to tune in to sleep so that he does not notice.If a child has a favorite music, turn it until he takes a bath and change clothes;under its accompaniment can also be read bedtime story Dreams: how to understand our dreams Dreams: how to understand our dreams (most importantly, that the music was quiet, and if it so happens that your child likes something in the spirit of Rammstein (which is rare, but it happens)it is better to select a melody to your taste).

Another method to cope with a child in this situation is to get the child to say "yes" at least three times in a row.To do this, ask him various questions, such as: "You like to play with these toys for the bath, right?" (Yes, and how!), "And maybe the next time you try to take a bath with glasses for swimming, going to be great?"(good idea!) "This dinosaur is swimming?Will you show me? "(Of course show! Look at that!).First, the child is important that parents show an interest in what he likes most.Second, psychologists believe that when a person agrees with you at least three times in a row, it helps to break the resistance, and it is ready to agree to continue, and thus will not feel that he is under pressure.

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Meals

Situation: A child refuses to eat vegetables, accepts only the white carbohydrate and other junk food or says that he is not hungry.You, on the one hand, fear that it will starve and lose weight, on the other hand, you hate to see such an attitude after you have spent a lot of time to cook dinner.

What to do: Put on the table before the child small portions of food that you have prepared.Let them a bit - you can put a small plate of vegetable salad and boiled rice, but you can still give the child a choice.This is important because often children refuse to eat not because they do not want to eat what you have prepared, but because they feel the need to demonstrate its will, that at a certain age it is quite natural.At the same time, experts recommend not to talk about food (no "let's eat and then stay hungry!").Start eating themselves, and at the same time tell the child and others present at the table about how was your day, the weather - in short, everything except food and behavior of your child.

If the child agrees to have the first and second dish just for dessert, psychologists are advised to immediately put in front of him dessert, but the portion should be very small.For example, one small cookie or a cake, a candy, and so on.The child should know - that's all he gets, and there is a minimal amount of main dishes to dessert feels full, it will not leave.He can eat dessert at once, and if he is still hungry - and he probably will - be able to return it to the soup or vegetable salad, which refused at first.

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Clothing

Situation: Your little fashionista (or mod) Wear clothes that you think will look silly and out of place, or it is simply not the weather.Another variant of the situation - a child every morning tends to re-measure, at least half of his wardrobe.

What to do: First, if your child has too many clothes, you know that you have created the premise for this situation.Therefore, it is necessary to remove unnecessary things - that is not the right time of year and that can be worn only on special occasions.Do this when the baby is asleep or busy with something else.If you ask him whether it is possible to remove those or other things, he must say that it is impossible, but if you do it without his knowledge, he is unlikely to notice something.

Secondly, it is possible to cook in the evening for baby clothes for tomorrow, or make two or three sets of clothes to choose from, so that he could take the initiative.

If the child does not want to wear a jacket and getting ready to throw a tantrum about this, to give him, but before leaving the house grab his jacket with him.Five minutes later, his teeth were chattering from the cold beast will be very happy to put on a jacket stockpiled.During this time, he is unlikely to earn cold (if he has, in general, normal health), but a good lesson.