- Children's fears where lives bogeyman?
- what and why fear
Someone who lives in the closet or under the bed, rustling in the dark, harsh criticisms of teachers or parents.What do they have in common?All this - the common children's fears.It would seem that there is nothing to fear, but try explaining that to a child.He still can not distinguish the imaginary from the real, and he does not always help the words used by adults, for example - "the creaking floorboards - it's just creaking."Fortunately, parents can do a lot to help children better cope with their fears.
various parties childhood fears
fear - it's not always a bad thing.In fact, in some cases, it can serve as a kind of insurance policy.Were it not for our fear, not many would have survived to adulthood, and not all have lived could boast of good health.Some of our fears are evolutionary.So many children - and adults - are afraid of snakes, whether or not they are toxic, although the city dweller for his life much more
What causes fear in infants and young children:
- loud noises and sudden movements in the field of view;
- Large objects blur (large from the point of view of a child - an adult they can be quite small);
- parting with loved ones (usually - with the mother);
- changes in the house.
common fears of preschool children:
- sounds in the dark;
- Monsters and spirits;
Widespread fears of school-age children:
- snakes and spiders;
- storms and other natural disasters;
- stay home alone;
- fear of the wrath of teachers and other adults;
- terrible news and movies;
- injury, illness, doctors, or death;
- Fear of failure and fear of rejection.
Fears of infants and young children
In an ideal situation the world baby surrounded by robust walls of parental care, and filled with a sense of peace and security.All that somehow violates a picture of the world - loud noises, strangers, and so on - can cause fear.The easiest way not to provoke fear - to arrange a peaceful, predictable from the point of view of the child's life.The number of people who take care of a small child should be limited to parents and a few closest people.Constant maintenance of communication with your child - through eye contact, touch, talk - also helps him feel that he is safe.This last point is most important.Some moms manage to travel a lot and lead an active life with small children, and despite frequent barter situation anxiety anxiety - how to distinguish normal from disease? child does not increase - it happens when the mother (father or another person who cares for the child) helps him in any place to feel comfortable.
When the child's world expands, he begins to be afraid of new places and people.Sometimes these fears are related to the actual experience, sometimes - the result of the game of imagination.At this age, children are not able to effectively soothe themselves - in this they need help from their parents.If the child is afraid of the dark room, go there together, holding his hand to make sure that there is nothing to worry about.It is advisable not to turn on the lights, and just walk through a dark room.When his eyes adjusted to the darkness, you show your child that all things are well as the light, and nothing has changed, except the lighting.Read your child a book before bedtime Dreams: how to understand our dreams by flashlight.Gradually, he changed the attitude towards the dark, and he realizes that dark room lit only differs from the fact that it is dark.
Avoid harsh methods to combat the fears.For example, closing a child in a dark room that he was convinced that no one was there, not in any case: firstly, because of the stress How to beat stress?Create an oasis imagination can draw a child such horrors, which could be the envy of Stephen King, and secondly, after such an experience a child can lose confidence in their parents.
If a child is afraid of dogs, do not offer him a right to come up and pet the dog another (even if you are sure that this dog - a good animal).Let the child will first consider a dog from the side, will determine whether it wags its tail (explain to him that this is usually a sign of position on the part of the dog), and say hello to her, keeping a distance.When to come closer, the child must decide for himself.
struggle with all other fears, too, should be gradual, otherwise the result will be opposite the expected.
Thanks to information sources around us students feel fear (not unfounded) the dangers of the outside world - fire, thieves, war, storms, and so on.
If a child is afraid of natural disasters, it is wise to check with him a guide for people caught in the zone of tornadoes, earthquakes, and so on.Even if in your area such disasters does not happen, do it - firstly, it will give your child the opportunity to say their own fears, and this is of great therapeutic value;Second, you can with your child to see where are usually tornadoes and earthquakes, and explain to him that, while you are at home, these disasters will not threaten.(Do not try to stop the fear words like "do not worry, we have earthquakes would not happen" - the child does not get rid of the fear, but in the future it will be all the less likely to turn to you with their problems).If your child has a fear of thieves or punishment in school is to talk with your child about what happens if something does happen from this.For example, explain to him that in the case of robbery to help the police (if your property is insured - tell us in general terms and about it), penalties in the school can be avoided if a good student, and in any case, because of two or comments in the diary youbaby do not stop loving.Do not try to get rid of simple words, for example - do not be afraid, there is nothing to worry about.Calmly explain to the child that can really happen in a situation where he's scared, and how you can avoid the worst scenario.So you teach him not to suppress their fears and face them and analyze them - this is a very useful skill for the child and adult.