Emotional blackmail: how not to become hostage to the child's behavior
- emotional blackmail: how not to become hostage to the behavior of the child restraint techniques
If your child to make a scene in public, do not worry, you'll be able to take his behaviorunder control.It is necessary to observe the behavior of a phased strategy, which you can use, the next time you go to a mall or a store.
Many parents are inferior child when the hysterics.Children often use emotional blackmail and threaten the bad behavior, only to get what you want.Some parents are even afraid to take the children in public places, especially the store because they know that the child will still buy whatever he asks if only he was not calling them, not stamped, not shout or make a scene that will make parents feelhumiliated and powerless.In fact, in such cases, parents simply become hostages of the child's behavior.
What is happening and what to do
What happens when parents are inferior to a child who behaves this way?The child understands that bad behavior will solve all their problems, because they know that parents still give way to him.Do not make the mistakes that provoke such behavior of children.
When a child does not get the desired, he arranges a tantrum in public.He worked out a model of behavior in which he blackmailed the parents to achieve the desired result.Baby thinking works like this: "Either give in to me, or suffer my bad behavior!".If the child is younger, he can yell, scream and went into hysterics.He can be angry facial expressions and tone that expresses disgust, and allow older children disrespectful remarks and even curses.Anyway, all the scenes that play children built on the use of bad behavior to control external circumstances.Children do not want to learn to solve problems faced.
When children learn this lesson, they realize that there is absolutely no reason to change something, or to grow.The more often parents encourage bad behavior of the child, the more he is convinced that this strategy is working behavior.That's right: you are, in fact, reinforces the child's desire to behave in an unworthy manner, after which he refused to follow the social rules and behave.
You have to treat education as follows: - Your task is to teach children good behavior and teach them how to live in society.In our culture to behave properly in public places, such as in the shopping center, and treat people with respect.If a child behaves inappropriately, and you give in to it, he will grow up without the skills to resolve difficult situations.
Another problem is that if the child tries to use the method to solve the problems of hysteria, he never really mastered the right way to solve problems.Sometimes it happens that children hysterics when they are frustrated and upset.No matter the reasons for the child arranges hysterics - because he was disappointed, frustrated, or depressed parents still have to adhere to certain rules.Children will continue to arrange a tantrum in public, if you go at them on occasion.
few words about the young children
If a child under the age of two to three years, arranges a tantrum, you do not have to do anything, just give them some time to settle down.When little kids get tired or have an overabundance of feelings, it is very difficult to control their emotions Emotions and culture: how to decipher the emotional code .Only the responsible parents know their children, know how kids are hardy, and understand when children are tired and want to go home.
in shopping centers can often observe children aged three to five years, crying or just frazzled.Many parents realize that their child is overtired.The mind of the adult and the child's mind the different senses stimulation.Adults know how to limit themselves and decide what they need and what is not.Children not yet know how to limit their wishes.Therefore, a hike with the child in a shopping center can be compared to going to the circus.Parents should be prepared for such behavior and patience to negative emotional outbursts of the child.Parents need to learn how to avoid such situations, or find a way to take them under control.
When the child arranges a tantrum because he was tired, and he was angry because he did not give the desired management skills such behavior are the same in different situations.You wait.You do not console the child.You do not give in to the child.