How to educate middle children: Tips for Parents
Middle children often get lost in the struggle between the older and younger, so they often behave provocatively and provocative just to attract the attention of parents.At the other extreme - complete submission and obedience - not to deceive you.After some time, this will result in obedience to revolt, to tame that will be very difficult.Parents can help a few tips regarding the education of their outgoing, naughty (or resigned), cheerful and curious middle child.
Take the time to explain
to the average child does not have to be jealous younger (pets) or senior (proud parents) children should not just give him more attention, and take it for what it is -along with its errors, errors and defeats.If your average child made a mistake and deserves punishment, it should be emphasized that the punishment has nothing to do with his bratmi-sisters, and only applies to him.Most repeat that there are other children in your family does not change your love for him.Explain the reason for the punishment the average child is especially important, because it can not determine their place in the family.
«first - test sample, and the second - is brilliant» ...
this teaser can often be heard on the playground, and, given the nature rebellious middle child (their rebellion - a way to divert attention from the parents of other children in the family), we can assume that it is shouting "middling."
According to child psychologists, middle children often go to extremes to attract the attention of others - dyed hair in a purple color, go to the youth subculture or become ardent fans of rock bands.All this is done with one purpose - to literally "find himself", to find identity.One way to prevent this behavior - to give the child more time and attention to the need for rebellion and no longer sought to prove the child is not his parents, that he was also there.Most praise him for his beautifully painted watercolor - and he will be less temptation izrisoval graffiti wall in the living room.
Mission - peacekeeper
But the presence of other children in the family may be a beneficial effect on the character of the middle child - he grows quiet andchildhood accustomed to act as a peacemaker, settling conflicts between older and younger.The eldest daughter announces that colored pencils are hers, and flatly refuses to share?The situation will settle the middle child.Psychologists explain peacekeeping nature middle child so that they can not tolerate anger and aggression, so use logic to resolve conflicts.Of course, a symbolic smoke the pipe of peace - a great idea, but watch out for, so that the average child is not trampled in the heat of the dispute.Remember to be a peacemaker and play the role of the referee - the duty of parents, and not one of the children.
child finds time
Psychologists strongly recommend that parents listen to the average child.For example, you can ask him what better to prepare for dinner, or wherever you need to go at the weekend.Be interested in his life and often try to spend time with him.For example, you can pre-plan a joint trip to the cinema or a museum (just you and it), and the child will look forward to that day.Paying attention and time to the average child, you show him that he is important to you, it is not less important than other children.
Praise the child and strongly emphasizes his success
Many parents perceive the achievements of the second (or third, fourth) child as a matter of course - after the success of their first-born can not be surprised.Meanwhile, the child is very important for parents to praise or even recognition of his achievements.Try to always pay attention surrounding the successes and achievements of the average child, emphasizing what it clever and well done.
your eldest son is able to correctly write any word, and wins prizes for school competitions?Do not try to force the average child to repeat the way older and do not put it up as an example - this may give rise to a feeling of inferiority and hostility.Cultivate personality, let your second child find its own niche - maybe he had a penchant for art or sports.Moreover, psychologists claim that the average children often resort to creativity, to find a unique place in the family, especially if the older child is already in school and get good grades.
Be open to communication
Ideally, all parents should be able to read their children as an open book.Unfortunately, very few adults can distinguish pout, "I'm hungry!" By grimaces, "I hurt for you!".Remember, even if the average child is silent and does not extradite its own feelings, he may suffer from your neglect.Therefore, parents should talk with your child, explain to him that it is difficult to give all children equal attention.Say, "We are with the Pope is difficult to keep track of everything: your big brother will soon go to school, and younger sister still quite small, and it needs constant supervision.If you feel that we do not pay attention to you, come to us and frankly about it. "
Do not let the child continue wearing things older
Well, in some cases it is possible to make an exception, but turn the wearing out of things for seniors in any case should not become the rule.All the main important thing for a child (jeans, jacket, sweater), you should buy for him, with his participation.To the average child did not feel secondary, put it special privileges, for example, allow to select and watch a movie without interference from other children and adults.
Most Photograph baby
most important - take care to family photos on the average child is not lost among the others.Do not let him fall prey to stereotypes when family album full of pictures of the eldest son or daughter from all angles, and the second child is flashed somewhere in the background, like a poor relative.Be sure to take a few individual portraits of middle child - he must know that the parents see it as a personality.