Compliments and their meaning: do not mistake the words
compliments - it's an amazing component of social life.Right to compliment can give so much positive energy, a lot of things start to happen after that, as if by magic.It can ease the tension between people and place them gently together.This is possible if a compliment was made correctly and properly adopted.Each person needs to be able to do something, and more.
Compliments (not counting the most templates) appear where there are situations and efforts praiseworthy.That is a good compliment - a measure of thoughtfulness and awareness.A person who wants to learn how to communicate effectively, we must cultivate a considerate attitude towards the changes occurring around.
When a person sees something that he wants to praise, to compliment is two steps - to clothe thought in words and express it out loud.From compliments everyone wins - the one who says them, and the one who receives them, and those who are simply there and listen (even if they do not rejoice over the other, you probably remember exactly how to say a compliment).
How should and how not to make a compliment?
attentive to the choice of a compliment
Think about what's important to the person you are going to praise."Cool biceps" - a compliment likely enjoy person involved in bodybuilding, and a university professor can not appreciate this comment (of course, there are exceptions).If a person is engaged in intellectual work, it is best to celebrate compliment his intellect;if a girl watches a fashion and loves clubbing, mark her clothes, hair and nails.
Short and sweet
Such compliments like "Good job!", "We have worked great!" In the appropriateMany situations require the speaker voltage mind, but produce a significant positive effect.
compliment - it is not flattery.Conversely
all nice to receive compliments, but - sincere.Most people dislike flattery causes, and those who like it, you would not want to please.So it is better not to talk of compliments than flattering.
Do not compliment your boss - even if you are sincere, many people in leadership positions, to automatically accept compliments subordinates as flattery and see it for selfish motives.If you want to praise the boss, say something good about it to his assistant.In 90% of cases he mentions it in a conversation with the head, and it will not be perceived as flattery.
compliments from strangers compliments
Often, hearing something bad about a person familiar to us, we hasten to give him those words.Someone benefits from it?It is doubtful, and it is not necessary to transmit such messages.But if you hear a familiar speak well, be sure to tell him about it.It will be nice and it will be grateful to both you and those whom you quoted.
sometimes mean better than talking
In some cases it is better to speak phrases from which man himself will make a conclusion that will compliment it.For example, say, "Wow, you lost the puzzles in five minutes, and I had to wrestle before lunch" rather than "You're smarter than me."Or, for example, I met a friend who recently had cosmetic surgery, say "How was the surgery?" - Make a small pause, and they themselves give the answer: "I can see that very well."Person understands what you mean, in this case you do not have to use a standard and an unspecified "You look so good!»
The fact that a person is easier to believe the findings, which he made himself than the information that was presented to him "ready-made. "
right words at the right time
If you've ever played before a large audience, which follow your every word, and then finished with a still pounding heart, heard in his address: "Thisit was great! "- you know exactly what it takes to compliment at the right time.There are times when it is absolutely necessary to make a compliment.Even then you will find that your performance was not great, you did not consider those words offensive because at that time it was necessary to speak only words.Within five minutes they were not welcome.This did not even really sincere compliment, worth hundreds of sincere, spoken at the wrong time.
And how to accept compliments?
When he heard the compliment, you respond in the spirit of "Oh, I was just lucky," "Well, actually it's an old dress, what's there to see," "Nothing in particular," that soon you will notice that allrarely hear compliments in his address.But you do not want?Thank when you praise - from the heart.And smile, because people make a compliment, I make you happy, and it happened.