The age difference between spouses: what is optimal?
- age difference between spouses: what is optimal?
Usually, the ideal age difference between partners or spouses is considered 3-5 years or less.The age difference between partners of 10 years or more can be a significant problem relations.Even if you are both free-men, stereotypes can live in the minds of your loved ones.To the age difference did not interfere with love, you need to follow a few relatively simple rules.
Be honest with each other
First of all, do not deny the existence of problems.Recognize that age difference matters.
If one of you wants children and the other - no (because they he or she already has, or because it is a conscious decision for a long time), discuss it directly.In addition, it is necessary in advance to keep in mind that the partner who is much older than you, in a few years can become almost helpless.If you are not ready to assume the role of caregivers, talk about it directly.It is not cruel, but honestly - and in fact has long been known that a good relationship can only be built on honesty.
Be prepared for the reaction of the family
No matter how you free of stereotypes, your family members may be guided moretraditional views about life.Many people are not ready just loyal to the relationship in which one partner is much older than the other - especially if your partner is almost the same age as your parents.Tell them about your relationship, not in the expectation that they will be happy and congratulate you.In the future, everything will depend on you - your family will be happy if you're happy.
Sex: consider the needs and opportunities
is necessary at the outset to understand that if a man in a pair of much older women, sex can be difficult.As a general rule, although there are exceptions, it is difficult to meet the needs of a man much younger partner due to natural aging changes.
To overcome this difficulty, we must speak directly to each other about what you want and what you are missing.There is nothing to be ashamed of as peers in pairs and sexual life does not always satisfy both partners.Perhaps, for you will be the release of a healthy way of life, or any drugs that improve the potency and variety of experiments in the sexual sphere.
Learn to ignore not prejudice
«She needed his money," "it's a little wiser and find a younger woman" - is the most lenient opinion that many people take out a pair with a noticeable difference in age.Be prepared not to take offense at questions like, "This is your father?" Or "Is that your son?".Do not waste too much energy on trying to convince colleagues and girlfriends that you feel good with a loved one, no matter what.True friends will understand this, and so, what to do with the unreal - you decide.
Find out their reasons
Why do you want to be with this person?Because of him?Because of his age and social status?Or because of something else?If you have always attracted people much older or younger than you, you may want to consult a psychologist.By itself, the age difference is not a problem, but if the identity of the partner for you relegated to the background, you need professional help.
Look for common interests and hobbies
actor Alex Baldwin, who is now more than 50 years, said: "What could be worse than waking up next to a woman twenty-five years?I want to fall somewhere, because she absolutely nothing to say. "
lack of common interests, in order to talk, too much difference in the intellectual development of relations with the partners a great difference in age can be devastating than the potency problems or misunderstanding of the family.Therefore, no need to wait until your conversations will not be composed almost entirely of awkward pauses.From the beginning, the relationship to do something together - a photo, horse riding, growing cacti and so on.