Divorce and children - in war all means are good?


Divorced Children Divorce - one of the unpleasant realities of modern life.When two people meet, fall in love, get married and have a child, often say that now their life has become full.However, with time and under stress of modern life in a relationship often comes two cooling, and they no longer want to be together.As a result, divorce, division of joint property, and children who play the role of observers.

When parents think about the separation and divorce, children experience intense emotional stress and often receive psychological trauma.Psychological effects of divorce on children have long been the object of study of psychology.Although known ways to help your child survive the divorce of their parents, to completely eliminate the effects of this event possible.

How divorce affects children

Children are afraid that after the divorce will change their lives, that Mom and Dad will no longer love them, as before.Children think about with which parent they will remain where they will live, whether to maintain relationships with friends or they will completely change the social circle.Because of this uncertainty in the child a feeling of loss of control over the situation, because from it depends nothing.

After the divorce, the parents are often corrupt relationship when they met scandals and quarrels, do not hesitate child.This tension between parents may negatively affect the mental state of the child.Sometimes children try to reconcile the parents, of course, they did not work, so the children often feel guilty.They blame themselves for the divorce of parents, believing that misbehaved or put little effort to reconcile father and mother.In addition, the children begin to doubt themselves, they do not know which of them are now parents to love more.In some severe cases, a child may begin depression Depression - a little more than a bad mood Depression - a little more than a bad mood and he goes to, or, conversely, will behave aggressively and provocatively to attract attention.

The impact of divorce on children: psychological aspect

Children react differently to divorce.Many children have increased levels of anxiety, because they feel a sense of loneliness and loss, they think of their father or mother was thrown.Regardless of the relationship between parents, divorce is somehow reflected in the emotional state of the children.

Here are some of the psychological effects of divorce on children:

  • children think that their parents do not love them more than they feel abandoned and useless;
  • when children realize that their parents are no longer together, they feel a sense of helplessness and powerlessness;
  • even if children do not show anger and aggression, many of them have a strong destructive emotions Emotions and culture: how to decipher the emotional code Emotions and culture: how to decipher the emotional code ;
  • children often feel guilty for what happened, believing that it is their behavior led to a parting of parents;
  • addition, children feel guilty for what's going to love both parents equally, though still with mom or dad.

The impact of divorce on children: behavioral aspect

The behavior of the child after the divorce may experience a variety of changes associated with stressful experiences How to beat stress?Create an oasis How to beat stress? and undergoing psychological trauma, including sleep disorders Dreams: how to understand our dreams Dreams: how to understand our dreams (insomnia), aggression (violence towards animals or other children), destructive addiction (alcohol anddrugs), even suicide attempts.

When parents divorce, it is also possible the child's regressive behavior (psychological defense, expressed in a return to childish, childlike behaviors), when he can not sleep without a favorite toy, crying, when frightened, always in need of praise and approval.The signs of regressive behavior is bedwetting, and the emergence of nervous habits.

child may be tearful, moody, require constant attention.During this period, parents need to understand the behavior of the child, because it requires a greater emotional care.

Many children feel they have to take care of their divorced parents, so they assume the role of a friend and confidant.The belief that the child's mind is very mobile, and the child will easily survive the divorce of their parents - a dangerous delusion.In fact, most children need the support of parents and other loved ones to go through and make changes in their lives.